Wow, there's nothing like seeing a giant 6 foot flubbery asian man squished into an oversized diaper...it's kinda like trying to put toothpaste back into the tube..it's a scary mess...
Although, it is a very time honored past time of Japanese culture, Sumo wrestling is not glamorous - I'm not exactly sure who started the rumor that Sumo wrestlers are "sexy", but they should be tarred and feathered. Watching two walruses fight on the discovery channel is about the closest description of what I witnessed in real life at the big stadium dedicated just to Sumo in Tokyo. Fights last about 5 seconds and there's a mass of cellulite thrown around a ring until someone gets winded or uncoordinated and fall. People have their favorites who get these funny chants from the crowd similar to baseball hassling chants. They also get paid after each fight - so once you get done bashing each other, you get a stack of cash. One thing I don't get is why people pay so much for the floor seats....Here's my thoughts on that - if you have floor seats at the Lakers game - you would want someone like Kobe Bryant to fall in your lap - or maybe at a concert - you'd hope that the lead singer would crowd surf right into you - but there's no way in hell I want a 300 pound, sweaty, stinky, half naked Sumo man falling on me! I'd take that thousand dollar floor seat and cash it in - grab a nose bleed seat - far from the fat rolls, kick back with a beer and learn the funny chants...
So, when it's sunny out usually people wear sunglasses - but apparently in Japan like like to suffer from ocular migraines - since no one wears sunglasses during the day. I don't quite understand this since I know that I don't like to squint for hours on end....Though, it does make me look more like a celebrity when I rock the shades even in the train station...:)
I'm glad that I don't get pee shy, since urinals are placed about 3 inches from the next...I'm so used to the ones in the states that have partitions or separate dividers - unlike Tokyo - you have a place to hang your umbrella and put your bags above the urinal and bump elbows with the guy next to you...but the funniest part isn't that Japanese bathrooms would be a politicians' nightmare for a scandal in the states - but more that the people who clean the bathrooms are little old ladies and they has absolutely problem throwing a smelly stick into your urinal as your peeing. For a conservative country as Japan - I'm shocked that I'm able to pee with grandma...
Let's talk about work real quick...let's see where do I start....:P
So, I've been training to start next week with my new company - let's just say I'd rather chew on glass or sit on hot coals....It has to be the most degrading thing...for the trainers! Not only did we do the same lesson plans - we had to do them twice since I trained with someone - and the poor trainer had to pretend to be a 4 year old child...Im Japan, it's very important to pretend to like whatever you are doing even if you hate it!
At work, you are supposed to show up early, leave late and smile the whole time...I'm not shocked now why salary men in Tokyo drink every night, pass out on the trains home and then get up and do it all again...
Sharehouse rules 101 - let me enlighten you..
1. If you buy a carton of eggs - it doesn't mean that just taking one won't go unnoticed!
2. When you bring someone home with you, please make sure they have decent hygiene - I have to live here and don't want to smell them after they have left
3. Do not put porn on the background of the public computer that we all share - I don't need that awful surprise when I'm checking my email at 3 am!
4. The shower room is meant for what its called- to shower - its not a sauna, its not a nail salon, its not a barber shop - so please don't use it in other ways - oh and don't think that I haven't noticed someone using my expensive shampoo!
5. If there is a new person moving in - don't be an ass and scare them with all the horror stories of who's lived here in the past or other strange thing - let them work it in with baby steps...
6. If you are an early riser - please remember that not all of us share your enthusiasm about sunrises and birds chirping since many of us have just come home from all night of partying and just need to pass out and start our awful hangovers in peace!
7. Don't discuss politics and religion - much like you wouldn't do it with your new in-laws - unless there's a large bottle of Whiskey on the table - then it's fair game....
8. If you're sick - please put yourself in quarantine - I don't want your strange bird flu!
9. The laundry room is not meant for the holy grail of places "not to get caught" while messing around with the new drunk mess you brought from the bar last night - I want to know that my clothes are going to go in dirty and come out clean!
10. Lastly, remember that we are all here to learn about each other and share our experiences about the past - don't play the TMI game with me cause I'm probably going to remember when you tell me about "....the one time that I got crabs..."
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