Damn Birds

Happy Fourth of July

It's strange to be in a city where there aren't big firework shows - since that's what I've grown up with and definitely missed this weekend. I love the outdoor BBQ's and the endless flow of beer - followed up with some off key national antheming and watching dumb boys see who can get the closest to the firework without it blowing their eyebrows off.

I have learned that I don't need an alarm clock in the morning since recently the neighborhood pests have moved into my block - where instead of hearing cooing from the pigeons in the morning - I hear them trying to procreate instead - sounds a bit like when you accidentally step on a cats tail and it yelps - well try that for an hour in the morning - not all that romantic.

The farther out you go into the countryside the less english people speak - no let me rephrase that - they turn what they think is english into Japanglish. Let's look at a menu for example. Would you want to order the assorted fried chicken cartilage on the menu? Or maybe the excess pork fat lumps? How about the raw chicken sashimi - Salmonella anyone?

There is really only one main street in Kasukabe that goes from the freeway right to the train station. Its nice since they just repaved the road and biking is easier there now, the only thing that they haven't fixed are the birds that hang out in the trees above. Everyday, biking home is like a sparrow poop russian roulette. The trees overhang onto the street and there are thousands of birds in the trees - the noise is unreal - the high pitched squawking sounds like my class of 5 year olds on Tuesdays...

Speaking of class, let me tell you about some of the students and what things they have accomplished this week...

My whale child still picks his nose heavily in class, but I have gotten him to at least stay near his seat. The sneezing girl decided that she wanted to draw all over her friend in class - so I gave her a permanent marker...ooops

One of my older student has issues with his teeth - each class he is missing a different tooth and the one missing from the class prior has found it's way back into his mouth. It's like oral dominos...

Afternoons have become daycare at work - the parents drop them off, they terrorize us for an hour and then we send them on their way - I really wish we had a playground to send them to since I have become the official new jungle gym and I swear if more child tries to pants me while they others are hangin on like bats - I'll loose it!

The only good thing about the parents is the tend to bring us gifts - probably as a pleading thank you for taking care of the little monsters for an hour so they can breathe....but they are pretty good snacks - I must say Japanese women are pretty good bakers. It funny though since every girl in Japan seems to be on somekind of diet, the managers give me all the food and make sure that I eat it so it looks as though we all have partaken in the gifts. Let's just say that Godiva gets old after a while..

I have found that Japanese people are seriously hypercondriatic....every time they get a bump - see the doctor, have a head ache - see a doctor, have a hangnail - see a doctor. It's almost on the verge of being ridiculous - and the funny part is they tell me to go all the time, but I won't have any idea what the doctor is telling me anyways....He will probably tell me it's just a cold, but with my lack of Japanese skills - I'll probably think he's tell me I have Leukemia...

I was pretty bummed last week when Pride happened in Seattle - it's pretty much my favorite holiday weekend (yes, I made it a national holiday) because I can be ridiculous, dance until the wee hours of the morning, drink myself crazy, do unladylike things out in public and wear whatever I think is appropriate clothing. The pride in Tokyo is going to be a lot less exciting I'm sure - I'm guessin the crowd might swell to 50 by the middle of the event - they will have floats made of rice, rainbow kimonos, asian tourists and me...on a float...alone...in my underwear...happy Pride/Fourth!